Yesterday we had the first rain storm of the session. Mike and Jenn left at a good time. It was rainy, cold, and windy. The wind is what really gets us around here. The kids and I counted tree branches that had fallen on the way to my parents for dinner. It was Tuesday, our day to mooch a free dinner. Greg decided to head home and get some laundry done and have some alone time.
The kids and I left to go home at 7:30 pm. It was dark and still raining and windy. As usual Liam feel asleep on the way home. Typically, I unload all the crap from the car and take it into the house before getting the kids in the house, but I open their doors so I can hear Brianna talking. Last night, I kept the doors closed and had a huge load to haul in; Ashley sent a bag of stuff for me into work with Joaquin, Mom had given me a bag of the kids stuff, two kids umbrellas, my purse. My hands are full and I go to open the door. It's locked. I ring the doorbell . . . twice. No answer from Greg. I have to get to my purse and fish my keys out. I'm cursing Greg under my breath as the wind and rain are beating on my back. I drop all the crap on the floor and go back out to get Brianna. I get her in and tell her to go find Daddy. I then go back out in the wind and rain to get Liam. He's just a dead weight. As I get him to the front door, Greg appears and asks if I need help. I think I gave him one of those looks. You know the one - "Where the hell were you five minutes ago. I've got it covered now."
At this point you might be wondering about the title of this post. Hold on it's coming.
I close the door forcefully and Greg says, "What's wrong?"
I think, "Really?! You're going to ask me what's wrong?"
Instead I say, "The door was locked and I'm soaking wet and I rang the door bell twice."
He then says, "Sorry. I was in the bathroom."
I say while stomping away, "I've got to get these wet clothes off."
Here it comes:
As I walk back to the bedroom to change my clothes, I realize that I'm not really mad at Greg for the door being locked. I'm really just mad and stressed from the drive home. I go back into the living room and explain to Greg.
"I'm sorry. I'm not mad at you. On the way home, I had someone right on my ass and was behind someone driving 20 mph under the speed limit - with the kids in the car. So I was just stressed out from the drive home."
So there it is. I realized what was really bothering me and that I was taking it out on my poor husband, who just wanted to use the bathroom in peace. Not only did I realize what the issue was, but I also apologized to Greg. Huge step for me and my Karma.
I'm really trying to be better about this and I'm noticing it's making both Greg and I happier.
Now why is it that we abuse the ones we love the most?!
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
Karma
I was reading a blog post about a Karma Project that an ordinary woman was embarking upon. Now she’s not one of those New Age types, she’s just a regular person like you and I trying to better herself through the use of Buddhist principles. This inspired me because I truly believe in Karma and reincarnation. I think in each life you are given some lessons to learn and if you don’t learn them the first time, then you get another life to figure it out. When you/your soul has learned everything and you’ve gotten all you can out of your physical lives, then you finally get to move onto the next plain of existence (Nirvina, Heaven, Whatever you want to call it). If you don’t spend your physical life trying to learn these lessons or if you do great harm, then your next life will be worse than your current life. Personally I like this version of hell better than the Christian one, mostly because you really are held accountable for your actions and just can’t ask for forgiveness. Have you ever had to deal with the person that is really good about saying they are sorry about whatever they did to you, but they don’t ever change their behavior. After a while you have to wonder how sorry they really are, but I digress. (And for my Christian friends, I do understand that God has a better ability than I to tell if someone is truly asking for forgiveness with an open heart)
Being inspired and believing one of my lessons for this life is to learn to be patient with everyone, I decided to try to follow this woman’s model to increase my good Karma and decrease my bad Karma. The model is basically this: Keep a tally on a piece of paper, putting a check mark in the negative category whenever I:
· Killed a bug (Buddhist teachings include not eating animals, but that’s not going to happen so this is as close as I’m coming to caring for all creatures)
· Said or emailed something sarcastic, negative, or mean to someone
· Lost my temper (even if no one knows I’ve lost it)
· Talked about someone behind his or her back
· Gossiped
· Lied (easy one to follow)
· Stole something (again an easy one to refrain from)
And putting a check mark in the positive category whenever I:
· Did something nice for someone
· Complimented someone (I often think these things and don’t say them to the person)
· Did not act in malice when I really wanted to
· Successfully transformed anger into compassion (much harder than it sounds)
As you can see from the list, some are going to be much, much harder than others. I’ve been doing this for two weeks, but only really being good about it in the car. In the car? You say. Yes, I have a very big problem with thinking evil thoughts while in the car. I don’t have patience for other drivers on the road, etc. Basically I have road rage, which since having children has gotten better (or at least while they are in the car). So my drives into work lately have gone something like this.
Damn, this guy in front of me is driving slow. I can’t wait to get to Davis, so I can pass him. Now wait Erin! The fact that he’s going 5 mph under the speed limit and you’re stuck behind him may be saving you from getting in an accident that’s going to happen up ahead and the universe is saving you from that.
Son of a bitch, that woman almost hit me when she sped up to merge in front of me. What the hell? Now she’s going to make me miss the green light because she’s doing her make-up in the mirror and didn’t notice it turned green. I wish I had that laser vaporizer thing to just get rid of her ass. Oh that’s not good, my Karma just went in the toilet. Okay, think of something. Think! Uhh, maybe it makes her nervous to be behind an SUV because she can’t see around it (don’t worry that your car is a very small SUV) and so she just had to get in front. It’s very smart of her to only do her makeup at stop lights, since I’ve been behind women putting on makeup at 45 mph.
The first day I was working on my driving Karma, I did really good. I was pretty relaxed too and only 3 minutes later to work than normal. I had a morning appointment that day (blood work, urg), which is important to know because of the parking situation at work. Because I come in at 7:00, I typically get a good spot on the side of the building which is close. By 8:00 all those spots are gone. I got back from my appointment at 8:15ish and actually saw someone leaving that parking lot after not finding a spot. Before I turn into MY parking lot, I see my spot I had earlier and it’s still empty. What are the chances? This never happens. Oh my gosh, it’s my good driving Karma at work and almost immediately. It surely was a sign from the universe that I was on the right path.
Even with that immediate result, it’s been a tough couple of weeks trying to keep up the good Karma. I’m definitely going to keep trying because it can only help me in the long run.
I was severely tested on Monday and I didn’t do well at all. I completely lost my temper and let it effect my interaction with another person, who had nothing to do with the situation I was angry about. I’ll blog about that in more detail later. I think I’m going to try to do a Karma update on this blog every Friday. I know it’s not really related to updating you on the latest cute thing the kids have done, but I do think it relates to the fact that I should be a better mother and wife for doing this.
Wish me mindfulness!
Being inspired and believing one of my lessons for this life is to learn to be patient with everyone, I decided to try to follow this woman’s model to increase my good Karma and decrease my bad Karma. The model is basically this: Keep a tally on a piece of paper, putting a check mark in the negative category whenever I:
· Killed a bug (Buddhist teachings include not eating animals, but that’s not going to happen so this is as close as I’m coming to caring for all creatures)
· Said or emailed something sarcastic, negative, or mean to someone
· Lost my temper (even if no one knows I’ve lost it)
· Talked about someone behind his or her back
· Gossiped
· Lied (easy one to follow)
· Stole something (again an easy one to refrain from)
And putting a check mark in the positive category whenever I:
· Did something nice for someone
· Complimented someone (I often think these things and don’t say them to the person)
· Did not act in malice when I really wanted to
· Successfully transformed anger into compassion (much harder than it sounds)
As you can see from the list, some are going to be much, much harder than others. I’ve been doing this for two weeks, but only really being good about it in the car. In the car? You say. Yes, I have a very big problem with thinking evil thoughts while in the car. I don’t have patience for other drivers on the road, etc. Basically I have road rage, which since having children has gotten better (or at least while they are in the car). So my drives into work lately have gone something like this.
Damn, this guy in front of me is driving slow. I can’t wait to get to Davis, so I can pass him. Now wait Erin! The fact that he’s going 5 mph under the speed limit and you’re stuck behind him may be saving you from getting in an accident that’s going to happen up ahead and the universe is saving you from that.
Son of a bitch, that woman almost hit me when she sped up to merge in front of me. What the hell? Now she’s going to make me miss the green light because she’s doing her make-up in the mirror and didn’t notice it turned green. I wish I had that laser vaporizer thing to just get rid of her ass. Oh that’s not good, my Karma just went in the toilet. Okay, think of something. Think! Uhh, maybe it makes her nervous to be behind an SUV because she can’t see around it (don’t worry that your car is a very small SUV) and so she just had to get in front. It’s very smart of her to only do her makeup at stop lights, since I’ve been behind women putting on makeup at 45 mph.
The first day I was working on my driving Karma, I did really good. I was pretty relaxed too and only 3 minutes later to work than normal. I had a morning appointment that day (blood work, urg), which is important to know because of the parking situation at work. Because I come in at 7:00, I typically get a good spot on the side of the building which is close. By 8:00 all those spots are gone. I got back from my appointment at 8:15ish and actually saw someone leaving that parking lot after not finding a spot. Before I turn into MY parking lot, I see my spot I had earlier and it’s still empty. What are the chances? This never happens. Oh my gosh, it’s my good driving Karma at work and almost immediately. It surely was a sign from the universe that I was on the right path.
Even with that immediate result, it’s been a tough couple of weeks trying to keep up the good Karma. I’m definitely going to keep trying because it can only help me in the long run.
I was severely tested on Monday and I didn’t do well at all. I completely lost my temper and let it effect my interaction with another person, who had nothing to do with the situation I was angry about. I’ll blog about that in more detail later. I think I’m going to try to do a Karma update on this blog every Friday. I know it’s not really related to updating you on the latest cute thing the kids have done, but I do think it relates to the fact that I should be a better mother and wife for doing this.
Wish me mindfulness!
Friday, August 21, 2009
Swimming – Nature vs Nurture
Greg signed the kids up for swim lessons this summer. The first two week session the kids did before we went on our 4th of July vacation. They both ‘graduated’ with a ribbon at level 2. We spent a lot of time in the pool during our vacation and Brianna took to it quickly. She was jumping to Greg or Grandma in the water either doing a cannon ball or Nestea plunge. She had no fear. Liam did much better this summer, he could ‘walk’ around in the shallow end and loved the water gun fights with everyone, but still didn’t like getting his head/face wet.
The kids just finished the last two weeks of swim class. Brianna can now float for 10 seconds on her back by herself. She can float on her front for 5 seconds by herself. She can put her hands over her head in the streamline position and kick – basically swimming very slowly either on her back or front without help. She has near perfect form for a 3 year old. She just has a natural point to her toes and kick. And she always has a huge smile on her face while she’s in the water. Liam floated on his back by himself for 1 or 2 seconds. As soon as he felt the instructor’s hands move he would tense up and pull into a ball causing him to start to sink. He won’t even put his face in the water to be able to float on his front. He does use a kick board and can kick the length of the pool as long as the instructor is right there. They again got ribbons for completing the class. Brianna ‘graduated’ at level 4 and Liam at level 2.
I can’t tell you how many people commented to either Greg or I about how well Brianna was doing and how fast she was progressing. Even the head instructor said Brianna was progressing faster than anyone she’d ever seen at her age. Greg and I think she’s going to be an Olympic swimmer or diver and we’re going to keep nurturing her love of the water. Liam will continue to take lessons until he can swim for safety reasons, but it’s not his talent. He’s going to be starting soccer soon, which Greg tells me Liam has a natural talent for – evidently he’s got really good ball control. It might have something to do with the fact that Greg loves to play soccer with Liam, so he gets a lot of practice. But Greg is the expert in this area and if he says that Liam has a natural soccer talent then who am I to say otherwise.
So while Brianna got the Boyd family love of the water, Liam got the Hogan healthy fear of the water. My dad was telling me at one of the swim classes how he never liked to swim and was no good at it, so it’s genetic and Liam just got the short end of the stick from us (Dad and I). Oh well, he can be the next David Beckham, while Brianna is the next . . . uhm Dana Torres, Greg Louganis?
By the way, Olympic positions for warm towel hander outer and crazed family member with signs have already been taken by Brianna’s aunts.
P.S. I'll post photos once I figure out how to get them from my blackberry onto my computer.
The kids just finished the last two weeks of swim class. Brianna can now float for 10 seconds on her back by herself. She can float on her front for 5 seconds by herself. She can put her hands over her head in the streamline position and kick – basically swimming very slowly either on her back or front without help. She has near perfect form for a 3 year old. She just has a natural point to her toes and kick. And she always has a huge smile on her face while she’s in the water. Liam floated on his back by himself for 1 or 2 seconds. As soon as he felt the instructor’s hands move he would tense up and pull into a ball causing him to start to sink. He won’t even put his face in the water to be able to float on his front. He does use a kick board and can kick the length of the pool as long as the instructor is right there. They again got ribbons for completing the class. Brianna ‘graduated’ at level 4 and Liam at level 2.
I can’t tell you how many people commented to either Greg or I about how well Brianna was doing and how fast she was progressing. Even the head instructor said Brianna was progressing faster than anyone she’d ever seen at her age. Greg and I think she’s going to be an Olympic swimmer or diver and we’re going to keep nurturing her love of the water. Liam will continue to take lessons until he can swim for safety reasons, but it’s not his talent. He’s going to be starting soccer soon, which Greg tells me Liam has a natural talent for – evidently he’s got really good ball control. It might have something to do with the fact that Greg loves to play soccer with Liam, so he gets a lot of practice. But Greg is the expert in this area and if he says that Liam has a natural soccer talent then who am I to say otherwise.
So while Brianna got the Boyd family love of the water, Liam got the Hogan healthy fear of the water. My dad was telling me at one of the swim classes how he never liked to swim and was no good at it, so it’s genetic and Liam just got the short end of the stick from us (Dad and I). Oh well, he can be the next David Beckham, while Brianna is the next . . . uhm Dana Torres, Greg Louganis?
By the way, Olympic positions for warm towel hander outer and crazed family member with signs have already been taken by Brianna’s aunts.
P.S. I'll post photos once I figure out how to get them from my blackberry onto my computer.
Friday, August 7, 2009
Dear Paul – You are so NOT inspiring
Every day for the past month and a half I have been receiving an email from Paul with the subject: Christ Fulfills All … After about a week, the emails started to go into my Spam folder, but I still have to go in there and empty that folder. It’s annoying and it’s been going on for so long, that evil thoughts have started entering my mind.
(By the way, did anyone but me wonder what All Christ Fulfills. It’s kind of a fun fill in the blank game. Christ Fulfills All Buckets of Water. Christ Fulfills All Politicians Dreams. Don’t try to understand how my brain works. I gave up years ago out of frustration.)
Now back to my story.
Those that know me well can imagine the graphic nature of these thoughts, but many of my family members and a lot of my dear friends are God fearing/loving Christians and very good people. Before writing this blog entry the idea did cross my mind that one of my family members signed me up to receive these daily inspirationals with good intentions and hopes that I might see The Light. They don’t realize that’s just not going to happen -- too much pagan blood flowing through my veins perhaps (although that means it’s flowing through some of their veins as well). Then I got worried that maybe my dear, sweet husband signed me up (horror of horrors), but that thought quickly left my head. He knows it’s a lost cause (although I am a little nervous about him deciding to read my blog for the first time and this is the post he sees). Before I get to my evil thoughts, I really don’t intend to offend anyone, especially the people that love me and will be praying for my immortal soul if they are brave enough to continue reading.
Okay are you ready? Take another second for one more prayer.
Now back to Paul (and not my Uncle Paul, who I originally thought the email came from before I looked at the subject line) and the evil thoughts swirling through my head. The thoughts started out fairly mundane (well for me at least) – I wanted to email him back everyday with some satanic quote, but I would have no idea where to find those types of things. Then they progressively got worse as my annoyance level went up – I wanted to send him emails with pictures of goat sacrifices or perhaps human sacrifices – that would really freak him out (wait a second that would totally freak me out). And finally ended with some God Father like scenes of Paul waking up to animal heads in his bed and 666 scrawled in blood on his alarm clock (no I don’t know why I think 666 on an alarm clock is funny except if I saw that on mine I would think I was really late).
Of course these are just thoughts and I would never, ever act on them especially because I have no idea how to contact Paul because his return email address is hidden. Oh and he’s probably not even a real person, but some virus lurking waiting for me to click the link on Psalms 23 or whatever.
Yes, I’m aware that I’m going to Hell and you know how much I love heat.
As an aside, my friend, I’ll call him M, once told me the funniest story, which I’m going to screw up somewhat because it’s been over 10 years since I heard it and we all know how I like to ...uhm change stories unknowingly (seals on kayaks anyone?). He was tired of the bible thumpers coming to his door, so one day he had enough and the girl was telling him how Christ could save him, etc. He looked her straight in the eye and said he didn’t need Christ because he had Satan and he could call up demons to come and take her soul, so she better tell her friends to stop dropping by his place because he didn’t need saving. I think she might have cried or screamed or something and I think he felt slightly bad about it after he stopped laughing.
See I just think these horrible thoughts I don’t actually act on them, so I’m not so bad right?! What? I’m still going to Hell? Damn it!
(By the way, did anyone but me wonder what All Christ Fulfills. It’s kind of a fun fill in the blank game. Christ Fulfills All Buckets of Water. Christ Fulfills All Politicians Dreams. Don’t try to understand how my brain works. I gave up years ago out of frustration.)
Now back to my story.
Those that know me well can imagine the graphic nature of these thoughts, but many of my family members and a lot of my dear friends are God fearing/loving Christians and very good people. Before writing this blog entry the idea did cross my mind that one of my family members signed me up to receive these daily inspirationals with good intentions and hopes that I might see The Light. They don’t realize that’s just not going to happen -- too much pagan blood flowing through my veins perhaps (although that means it’s flowing through some of their veins as well). Then I got worried that maybe my dear, sweet husband signed me up (horror of horrors), but that thought quickly left my head. He knows it’s a lost cause (although I am a little nervous about him deciding to read my blog for the first time and this is the post he sees). Before I get to my evil thoughts, I really don’t intend to offend anyone, especially the people that love me and will be praying for my immortal soul if they are brave enough to continue reading.
Okay are you ready? Take another second for one more prayer.
Now back to Paul (and not my Uncle Paul, who I originally thought the email came from before I looked at the subject line) and the evil thoughts swirling through my head. The thoughts started out fairly mundane (well for me at least) – I wanted to email him back everyday with some satanic quote, but I would have no idea where to find those types of things. Then they progressively got worse as my annoyance level went up – I wanted to send him emails with pictures of goat sacrifices or perhaps human sacrifices – that would really freak him out (wait a second that would totally freak me out). And finally ended with some God Father like scenes of Paul waking up to animal heads in his bed and 666 scrawled in blood on his alarm clock (no I don’t know why I think 666 on an alarm clock is funny except if I saw that on mine I would think I was really late).
Of course these are just thoughts and I would never, ever act on them especially because I have no idea how to contact Paul because his return email address is hidden. Oh and he’s probably not even a real person, but some virus lurking waiting for me to click the link on Psalms 23 or whatever.
Yes, I’m aware that I’m going to Hell and you know how much I love heat.
As an aside, my friend, I’ll call him M, once told me the funniest story, which I’m going to screw up somewhat because it’s been over 10 years since I heard it and we all know how I like to ...uhm change stories unknowingly (seals on kayaks anyone?). He was tired of the bible thumpers coming to his door, so one day he had enough and the girl was telling him how Christ could save him, etc. He looked her straight in the eye and said he didn’t need Christ because he had Satan and he could call up demons to come and take her soul, so she better tell her friends to stop dropping by his place because he didn’t need saving. I think she might have cried or screamed or something and I think he felt slightly bad about it after he stopped laughing.
See I just think these horrible thoughts I don’t actually act on them, so I’m not so bad right?! What? I’m still going to Hell? Damn it!
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Sacrifices aka Stupidity
(NOTE: I am not a playwrite, so have no idea if I’m using this style correctly. Don’t judge.)
Act 1:
The scene: The Hogan kitchen on family dinner Tuesday night
Players: Grandpa Hogan (aka Popi), who would do anything for his grandchildren as quickly as possible. Brianna Boyd the adorable, but demanding three year old. Me, the mom who sacrifices her own comfort without thinking to ensure safety for her daughter.
Brianna sees container of cherries sitting on the counter. She asks Popi politely for one. He immediately hands her a cherry.
Me (as I start toward Brianna): “Do those have pits in them?”
I grab it away as Popi says, “Uh, I guess so.”
Brianna (screaming): “Mine! Mine cherry!”
I’m grabbing a knife out of the drawer and a bowl out of the cabinet as I say to Brianna, “Yes, I’m just going to take the pit out of it so you don’t choke. Just a minute.”
Brianna starts crying and is literally trying to climb up my leg as I stand at the sink cutting the cherry and dripping juice the color of blood into the sink. I drop the cherry pieces into the bowl and quickly run some water on my hands and where the blood juice has dripped into the sink. I’m thinking she’s going to make a huge bloody mess when eating the cherry. I quickly hand her the bowl as her tears subside. She looks down into the bowl and sets it on the kitchen table not eating a bite. URG!
Act 2:
The scene: The Hogan living room.
Players: Grandma Hogan, the wise matriarch. Liam Boyd the adorable and sensitive five year old. Me, the idiot.
I sit on the couch watching cartoons with Liam. I rub my eyes occasionally. Then the itching becomes intense.
Liam (looking over at me): “Mommy what’s wrong with your eyes?”
Me: “They’re just a little itchy.”
But I lie. They are incredibly itchy and I can’t seem to keep myself from rubbing them. And then it hits me. . . . .
That damn cherry! I didn’t wash my hands with soap after cutting up that DAMN cherry that Brianna didn’t even eat! URGGGGGGG.
Me (calmly): “Mom do you have any Claritin?”
The thoughts are running through my head: “Benadryl will work quicker, but then I won’t be able to drive the kids home because I’ll be too sleepy. Well, I could call Greg and have him drive us all home. But then what would we do about the car situation. I could ask my parents to drive us home - one of them driving my car and the other following in one of their cars. No that’s ridiculous. I’ll just take a Claritin and hope my eyes don’t swell completely shut. It feels like my eyes are barely open now. I really should be helping mom make dinner, but damn my eyes itch. Stop rubbing the eyes. No really stop it now. It’s only going to make it worse. I can’t believe I was so stupid, I know I have to wash my hands after cutting fruit. URG, it itches so bad. Just one more rub. I really hope mom can fix this for me. Please let the 24 hour Claritin kick in quickly, if they even have any. My eyes feel freaking huge and itchy. I hate cherries!”
Mom (from the bathroom): “Here’s some Claritin.”
I go into the bathroom to retrieve the little (hopefully miracle) pill and look at my eyes. I look like a boxer that didn’t do so well in the fight. Or maybe I just look slightly Asian with slits for eyes. I decide I must take a picture and share with the world how completely stupid I am and funny looking too. If this wasn’t happening to me it would be hysterical. I take the pill.
Liam (sitting in Popi’s chair): “Mommy are you okay?”
Me (tiredly rubbing eyes): “My allergies are bothering me right now, but I took some medicine and I will be fine in a little while.”
We all sit down to eat dinner and there are no cherries in sight.
Epilogue: I get the kids home safely with barely opened eyes. Liam falls asleep on the way home. As soon as I walk in the door I tell Greg I’m taking a Benadryl and going to bed, good luck with Brianna. I give him a short version of the story as he shakes his head at me as if to say, “You know better than to forget to wash your hands you silly girl.” I wake up the next morning after going to bed at 8:30 and sleeping like a log (and having some strange dreams about being chained in a room with people I can’t see coming and going and no one is helping me get unchained, not that I really want them to though) and find that my eyes are still slightly swollen. Not prize fighter swollen, just swollen enough that every time I blink I feel like my eyes are too big for my sockets.
So remember to always, always, always use SOAP and water after handling fruit you silly girl!
Act 1:
The scene: The Hogan kitchen on family dinner Tuesday night
Players: Grandpa Hogan (aka Popi), who would do anything for his grandchildren as quickly as possible. Brianna Boyd the adorable, but demanding three year old. Me, the mom who sacrifices her own comfort without thinking to ensure safety for her daughter.
Brianna sees container of cherries sitting on the counter. She asks Popi politely for one. He immediately hands her a cherry.
Me (as I start toward Brianna): “Do those have pits in them?”
I grab it away as Popi says, “Uh, I guess so.”
Brianna (screaming): “Mine! Mine cherry!”
I’m grabbing a knife out of the drawer and a bowl out of the cabinet as I say to Brianna, “Yes, I’m just going to take the pit out of it so you don’t choke. Just a minute.”
Brianna starts crying and is literally trying to climb up my leg as I stand at the sink cutting the cherry and dripping juice the color of blood into the sink. I drop the cherry pieces into the bowl and quickly run some water on my hands and where the blood juice has dripped into the sink. I’m thinking she’s going to make a huge bloody mess when eating the cherry. I quickly hand her the bowl as her tears subside. She looks down into the bowl and sets it on the kitchen table not eating a bite. URG!
Act 2:
The scene: The Hogan living room.
Players: Grandma Hogan, the wise matriarch. Liam Boyd the adorable and sensitive five year old. Me, the idiot.
I sit on the couch watching cartoons with Liam. I rub my eyes occasionally. Then the itching becomes intense.
Liam (looking over at me): “Mommy what’s wrong with your eyes?”
Me: “They’re just a little itchy.”
But I lie. They are incredibly itchy and I can’t seem to keep myself from rubbing them. And then it hits me. . . . .
That damn cherry! I didn’t wash my hands with soap after cutting up that DAMN cherry that Brianna didn’t even eat! URGGGGGGG.
Me (calmly): “Mom do you have any Claritin?”
The thoughts are running through my head: “Benadryl will work quicker, but then I won’t be able to drive the kids home because I’ll be too sleepy. Well, I could call Greg and have him drive us all home. But then what would we do about the car situation. I could ask my parents to drive us home - one of them driving my car and the other following in one of their cars. No that’s ridiculous. I’ll just take a Claritin and hope my eyes don’t swell completely shut. It feels like my eyes are barely open now. I really should be helping mom make dinner, but damn my eyes itch. Stop rubbing the eyes. No really stop it now. It’s only going to make it worse. I can’t believe I was so stupid, I know I have to wash my hands after cutting fruit. URG, it itches so bad. Just one more rub. I really hope mom can fix this for me. Please let the 24 hour Claritin kick in quickly, if they even have any. My eyes feel freaking huge and itchy. I hate cherries!”
Mom (from the bathroom): “Here’s some Claritin.”
I go into the bathroom to retrieve the little (hopefully miracle) pill and look at my eyes. I look like a boxer that didn’t do so well in the fight. Or maybe I just look slightly Asian with slits for eyes. I decide I must take a picture and share with the world how completely stupid I am and funny looking too. If this wasn’t happening to me it would be hysterical. I take the pill.
Liam (sitting in Popi’s chair): “Mommy are you okay?”
Me (tiredly rubbing eyes): “My allergies are bothering me right now, but I took some medicine and I will be fine in a little while.”
We all sit down to eat dinner and there are no cherries in sight.
Epilogue: I get the kids home safely with barely opened eyes. Liam falls asleep on the way home. As soon as I walk in the door I tell Greg I’m taking a Benadryl and going to bed, good luck with Brianna. I give him a short version of the story as he shakes his head at me as if to say, “You know better than to forget to wash your hands you silly girl.” I wake up the next morning after going to bed at 8:30 and sleeping like a log (and having some strange dreams about being chained in a room with people I can’t see coming and going and no one is helping me get unchained, not that I really want them to though) and find that my eyes are still slightly swollen. Not prize fighter swollen, just swollen enough that every time I blink I feel like my eyes are too big for my sockets.
So remember to always, always, always use SOAP and water after handling fruit you silly girl!
Friday, June 26, 2009
Proud (and thankful) to be an American
I read on CNN.com this morning that yesterday Michael Jackson’s death crashed a bunch of web sites for a time. Evidently the world wide web was brought to it’s knees by the King of Pop. And this just didn’t happen in the U.S. of A but all over the world.
This made me ponder the human race as I sometimes do. Everyone is so curious about MJ’s death and they want to know instantly when he died, how he died. And just to be clear I’m one of those people too. Yet, how many people were as interested in the protests in Iran and the death of Neda, the icon for those protests, or the genocide in Darfur that still continues. Why are we not as hungry for information on other more “important” global stories? Is it too painful to think about? Do we just feel helpless? Is it just to taxing on our brains to understand all the political, social, and other issues? Is it too far away to worry about?
For me personally, it’s very depressing to think about Iran and Darfur. I do feel somewhat helpless. I read the stories of people being killed for protesting their government and of women being systematically raped while their children look on and it’s absolutely horrifying. I turn away from that much pain and senselessness. It makes me so thankful that I was born an American in a time when someone else had already fought for my right to vote and fought for my civil rights and all the other freedoms that I enjoy. I am so thankful that I can sit back and be lazy and take these things for granted and mostly that I can surf the net to find out useless information about celebrities in a very voyeuristic way.
This made me ponder the human race as I sometimes do. Everyone is so curious about MJ’s death and they want to know instantly when he died, how he died. And just to be clear I’m one of those people too. Yet, how many people were as interested in the protests in Iran and the death of Neda, the icon for those protests, or the genocide in Darfur that still continues. Why are we not as hungry for information on other more “important” global stories? Is it too painful to think about? Do we just feel helpless? Is it just to taxing on our brains to understand all the political, social, and other issues? Is it too far away to worry about?
For me personally, it’s very depressing to think about Iran and Darfur. I do feel somewhat helpless. I read the stories of people being killed for protesting their government and of women being systematically raped while their children look on and it’s absolutely horrifying. I turn away from that much pain and senselessness. It makes me so thankful that I was born an American in a time when someone else had already fought for my right to vote and fought for my civil rights and all the other freedoms that I enjoy. I am so thankful that I can sit back and be lazy and take these things for granted and mostly that I can surf the net to find out useless information about celebrities in a very voyeuristic way.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Brianna's Rainbow Birthday Cake
After having a stomach virus this week and being down for the count for a little over three days, we postponed Brianna's birthday party. But I started feeling much better Friday night and decided to have my parents come over and do just a family party. I had already decided to do a rainbow cake after Amanda made some rainbow cupcakes that came out looking so cute. Originally, we were going to do a princess tea party and I was going to make the cake in the shape of a teapot. That didn't happen, but you can see the progression of the cake in the pictures above (again thank Amanda for giving me the idea to take pictures through the whole process).
All the pictures will be on Snapfish soon. Brianna enjoyed licking the frosting off the spatula. She got some fun gifts. The biggest being a new outside climbing/slide thing. She also really liked the shopping cart we got her and was pushing all her other gifts around in it and making sure Liam didn't touch any of it. It was a low key birthday, but fun. When asked she'll tell you she's three now, which she wasn't doing earlier in the week when we would ask how old she was going to be. I guess even at three girls don't like to be older than they really are or tell you their age.
Now I can start thinking about our 4th of July vacation. YEAH!
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